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The 11 Sweet 16 Players You Must Know About Or You Will Die

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Would I lie to you?

You probably feel like you've watched dozens and dozens of hours of NCAA basketball over the last week. Maybe you have! I literally watched a full 40-hour work-week of 18-22 year-olds (I myself was born in 1923) throwing orange balls at a metal orange circle, and it felt GREAT.

As good as the first few four days are, things really get down to business with the Sweet 16 and the Elite Eight, when the underdogs either turn into beautiful butterflies or remain awkward flustered tadpoles, and the favorites either justify their kingpin status or get cast to the curb like a leather skirt worn once by Kanye West. (Never mix your metaphors.)

Of course, when we're talking basketball teams, we're really talking basketball players. And these are the 11 players you must know before watching the Sweet 16, or else you might — will — die.

Tyrone Garland, LaSalle

Tyrone Garland, LaSalle

"Shout out to my cousin Vern. Shout out to my mom. All y'all, man. We out here!" With those words, LaSalle's Tyrone Garland immediately ascended into the pantheon of great post-game interviews, where he now sits alongside a statue of Kevin Garnett and a collection of Craig Sager's blazers. Garland isn't all bluster and smiles, though. He hit the game-winning layup against Ole Miss to send LaSalle to the Sweet 16, and he has really tremendous hair. Plus, he named his shot that beat Ole Miss the "Southwest Philly Floater," and having a shot with a name is totally rad. It's the basketball equivalent of christening your fists.


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