An incredibly scientific exploration.
"Hey I wonder what happened in the NBA last night. I'll check the box scores."
"What? The terrible, atrocious, very bad, unwatchable, sad husk of a basketball team that is the Wizards beat the Miami Heat? How is that possible? Did LeBron die?"
"So that means Wizards star John Wall must have somehow come back from injury, right? A miraculous comeback that no one saw coming?"
