“Champion”: A word not in your vocabulary.
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What it usually means: The state of feeling unfulfilled.
What it means in D.C.: Your normal state of being.
What it usually means: The champion or victor.
What it means in D.C.: A rare, extremely brief state of sports-related euphoria.
What it usually means: Forever.
What it means in D.C.: The last time one of your favorite teams won something meaningful.