Most likely to succeed! Probably a witch! Saddest walrus! They're all here.
With the Baltimore Ravens winning the Super Bowl, the 2012-2013 NFL season has come to a close. But we will remember it fondly, and our remembrances in particular will have to do with these 18 guys/teams/tattoos who made the year what it was. Cue the Vitamin C graduation song while you read it, because football is very, very sentimental. I am literally crying right now.
Most Impressive: Adrian Peterson
Image by Jeff Haynes / Reuters
Much like how the first cut is the deepest, this first award is the easiest: Nobody has shit on Adrian Peterson's 2012 season. In less than a year, Purple Jesus went from having his knee Eli Roth-ed to running like a buffalo on Adderall, and he carried a Vikings team with Jason Biggs at quarterback all the way into the playoffs. His 2,097 yards this season were the second-most by a running back of all time, missing the record by only nine yards, also known as the length Adrian Peterson moves in his sleep thanks to sheer momentum. Adrian Peterson is the Perpetual Motion Machine.
Most Likely to Succeed: Russell Wilson
Image by Dean Rutz/Seattle Times/MCT