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19 Questions People With Mustaches Are Tired Of Hearing

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“No, I’m not being ironic.”

"When are you shaving that?"

"When are you shaving that ?"

You're dead to me. Please get out of my line of sight.

Ron Swanson — Mustache Owner

youtube.com

"Are you allowed near schools or playgrounds?"

"Are you allowed near schools or playgrounds?"

Shut your mouth, or I'll shut it for you.

Shaft — Mustache Owner

MGM Warner Brothers / Via youtube.com

"Dad?"

"Dad?"

Nope, but I know your mom.

Eddie Murphy — Mustache Owner

Paramount Pictures / Via youtube.com

"Where's the rest of your beard?"

"Where's the rest of your beard?"

This is a life choice.

Robert Redford — Mustache Owner

20th Century Fox / Via youtube.com


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12 Things Ex-Athletes Have To Learn

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This one goes out to all the athletes trying to make it in the real world.

How to do laundry.

How to do laundry.

At my school, they did all our athletic laundry for us. I'd gather all my nasty clothes, load up my loop, and 24 hours later I'd have a wonderfully new bag of clean clothes. Now that my entire wardrobe has changed (see #6), I have to separate colors, know when to use cold and hot, and actually read clothing tags. Shit's ridiculous.

Fox

How to eat correctly.

How to eat correctly.

Trust me, athletes KNOW how to eat. We're practically more professional at eating than our sports. However, when your workout schedule changes from four hours a day to no hours a day, you can't consume 14,000 calories anymore without becoming a fat lard. Not being able to eat whatever you want is life shattering.

ohmagif.com / Via tumblr.com

How to workout alone.

How to workout alone.

Where's my strength coach yelling at me to run another lap faster? Where's the workout plan for the day? Where are my teammates that I get to bitch about the workout with? I CAN'T DO IT ALONE.

Via tumblr.com

How to deal with so much free time.

How to deal with so much free time.

I have no idea how NARPs (non-athletic regular person) run out of time in the day. There is at least a solid 5 hour chunk re-entered into my life and I have no idea what to do with it.

Lifetime Network / Via tumblr.com


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35 Odd Baseball Facts That Are Too Strange To Be Made Up

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This is why baseball is the best.

1. When Jimmy Pearsall hit his 100th home run in 1963, he ran the bases in the correct order but facing backward to celebrate.

2. Babe Ruth's top salary was $80,000 (in 1930 and 1931). Adjusted for inflation, that's the equivalent of a little more than $1.1 million today (a little less than middle reliever Antonio Bastardo made last year).

3. During World War II, the U.S. military designed a grenade to be the size and weight of a baseball, since "any young American man should be able to properly throw it."

4. Pitcher Jim Abbott was born without a right hand and had a 10-season baseball career, including throwing a no-hitter for the New York Yankees vs. Cleveland in 1993.

Jim Abbott.

jimabbott.net

5. Bobby Richardson won the World Series MVP in 1960 after hitting .367 with 12 RBIs — he played for the losing team.

6. Bank robber John Dillinger was once a professional second baseman, although he never made it to the major leages.

7. Eddie Gaedel was the shortest man to ever play in a Major League Baseball game. He was 3 feet and 7 inches tall. St. Louis Browns owner Bill Veeck put him in the game as a stunt, saying, "He was, by golly, the best darn midget who ever played big-league ball. He was also the only one."

8. Geddy Lee from the band Rush had a huge collection of autographed baseballs from the Negro Leagues; he donated over 200 balls to the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum in 2008.

9. Ralph Kiner is the only player ever to lead the league in homers for seven years in a row — his first seven years as a major league player.

Topps / Via cardsthatneverwere.blogspot.com


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22 Reasons NASCAR Is The Sexiest Sport There Is

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They’ll get your heart racing, alright.

NASCAR drivers come from a legacy of sexy.

NASCAR drivers come from a legacy of sexy.

George Tiedemann/Sports Illustrated / Getty Images

Everything about Kasey Kahne is sexy.

Everything about Kasey Kahne is sexy.

Anyone who disagrees should check their pulse.

Eugene Gologursky/Stringer / Getty Images

Same goes for Danica Patrick.

Same goes for Danica Patrick.

Her Royal Hotness.

GoDaddy.com / Via youtube.com

And, BTW, Kim Coon.

And, BTW, Kim Coon.

David Becker/Stringer / Getty Images


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Baseball Explained By An Australian (Who's Never Seen Baseball)

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This ignorant Aussie just watched his first baseball match. MLB Down Under.

Baseball players are the ultimate good sports. Much time is spent doffing caps, enquiring into each others health and generally being thoroughly nice chaps.

Baseball players are the ultimate good sports. Much time is spent doffing caps, enquiring into each others health and generally being thoroughly nice chaps.

"Good day Sir."

Cameron Spencer / Getty Images

Baseball seems a little like cricket, but is actually different in almost every way. Even when it's baseball being played on the Sydney Cricket Ground.

Baseball seems a little like cricket, but is actually different in almost every way. Even when it's baseball being played on the Sydney Cricket Ground.

Why is the guy on the left THROWING THE BALL? Surely that's not allowed?

Cameron Spencer / Getty Images

Instead of a big oval with all the action taking place in the centre, baseball is played on a weird diamond, with all the action taking place in one corner.

Instead of a big oval with all the action taking place in the centre, baseball is played on a weird diamond, with all the action taking place in one corner.

Simon Crerar / BuzzFeed

This makes for a lot of empty space.

This makes for a lot of empty space.

Also, make sure you buy tickets in the corner where all the action is.

Simon Crerar / BuzzFeed


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23 Struggles Every Soccer Girl Understands

Here's What Happens When You Try To Photobomb Your Coach On National TV

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After Connecticut’s 81-76 win over Iowa State, Huskies guard Terrence Samuel tried to photobomb his coach. Coach Kevin Ollie offered a quick rebuttal.

After his team's Sweet 16 win over Iowa State, UConn coach Kevin Ollie was interviewed live on CBS. His entire team tried to photobomb the interview.

After his team's Sweet 16 win over Iowa State, UConn coach Kevin Ollie was interviewed live on CBS. His entire team tried to photobomb the interview.

CBS

Chief among those photobombers was freshman guard Terrence Samuel.

Chief among those photobombers was freshman guard Terrence Samuel.

CBS

He really went for it.

CBS

As soon as the interview ended, here's how Ollie responded.

CBS / Via vine.co


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Should You Propose To Your Significant Other At A Baseball Game?

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A simple flow chart to help you make an important decision.

Dan Oshinsky / BuzzFeed / h/t swimmingly.com


Where The Fans Of Every Baseball Team Live, According To Facebook

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Or, why everyone seems to be a Yankees fan.

Facebook / Via cdn.bleacherreport.net

Today marks baseball's official Opening Day, and to celebrate, Facebook used some of its user data to map MLB fandom across the country. Specifically, Facebook went to MLB team pages and mapped the likes on each page county by county.

Unsurprisingly, the Yankees appear — based purely off data — to be not only America's favorite team, but Louisiana's favorite team, Virginia's favorite team, Hawaii's favorite team, Alaska's favorite team, and New Mexico's favorite team. If you're a Yankees fan, this is probably a point of pride. For everyone else, the wide dispersement of Yankee fandom no doubt looks like the spread of some vile plague, a nasty pinstriped virus moving swiftly across the nation.

A few more interesting results:

"Red Sox Nation" is real.

"Red Sox Nation" is real.

Facebook

The Atlanta Braves own the South.

The Atlanta Braves own the South.

Via Facebook


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Watch The Most Dedicated Local News Team Reenact NCAA Highlights

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The staff for WCJB TV-20 did their best to show viewers footage from the Florida Gators’ game against the Dayton Flyers.

youtube.com / Via deadspin.com

Some highlights from the the highlights include dribbles...

Some highlights from the the highlights include dribbles...

...yelling...

...yelling...

...getting down to business...

...getting down to business...


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Blue Jays Third Baseman Likes Butts

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Who doesn’t?

Here's Toronto Blue Jays third baseman Brett Lawrie.

Here's Toronto Blue Jays third baseman Brett Lawrie.

Eric Bolte/Usa Today Sports

Here's who he's following on Twitter.

Here's who he's following on Twitter.

Via Twitter: @blawrie13

Busted.

Busted.

MLB

David Ortiz Made Sure To Get A Selfie With The President When The Red Sox Visited The White House

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“The Big Papi Selfie!” - The President of the United States of America.

President Obama welcomed the 2013 World Series champion Boston Red Sox to the White House today. Obama made mention of the team's run as the most decorated Major League baseball team of the last decade with three world championships, crediting the team with helping the city of Boston heal post-Boston Marathon bombing last April.

Then this happened.

View Video ›

Yessir, Mr. President.

Yessir, Mr. President.

CBS Boston


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26 Of The Most Ridiculous Minor League Baseball Logos You'll Ever See

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Some will make you hungry, others will just confuse the hell out of you.

Montgomery Biscuits

Montgomery Biscuits

We know the South loves their breakfast, but come on.

milb.com

Normal CornBelters

Normal CornBelters

Something just isn't "normal" about a stoned ear of corn.

normalbaseball.com

Modesto Nuts

Modesto Nuts

Something tells us there's probably a lot of sexual innuendos being thrown around on a Saturday night at the ballpark.

milb.com

Jamestown Jammers

Jamestown Jammers

What were the people in Jamestown thinking?

milb.com


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84 Thoughts Every Mets Fan Will Have Over The Course Of The Season

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As they say in Queens, everything that can go wrong — always goes wrong.

APRIL

1. I think we're going to surprise a lot of people this year.
2. We might have the most underrated starting pitching staff in baseball.
3. You know, this could be a pretty tough lineup, if either Ike Davis or Lucas Duda produces.
4. I really think we have an outside shot at a Wild Card.
5. If Travis d'Arnaud turns out to be half the player that Buster Posey is I'll be happy.
6. I'll take the strikeouts if Granderson can give us 30 home runs
7. I already miss WFAN.
8. But seriously, what is our radio network now?
9. Maybe Tejada will play with a chip on his shoulder.
10. If everything breaks the right way 90 wins isn't impossible.
11. Bartolo Colon looks great for a 41-year-old.
12. I'll give Terry one more chance.
13. That Ike Davis jersey I got on sale last season is going to be a great investment.
14. You know what, I kinda like this team.

Al Bello / Getty

MAY

15. If it wasn't for the bullpen we'd be in first place right now.
16. We should wear those blue jerseys more often.
17. When is the last time we had a decent bullpen?
18. Has anyone figured out what radio station the Mets games are on?
19. David Wright is a really handsome man.
20. Where is my Lastings Milledge t-shirt jersey?
21. I like the scrappiness of this team.
22. I'm proud to root for this team.
23. Jenrry Mejia should never cut his hair.
24. It would be cool to fly into LaGuardia during a game.
25. They could be worse.
26. Okay, d'Arnaud isn't hitting but still calls a great game.
27. I wonder if Gary, Keith and Ron could do a better job coaching this team?
28. It's only May we can turn this around.

Chris Trotman / Getty


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23 Things Colts Fans Know To Be True

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Believe in blue.

March 7, 2012 was one of the hardest days of your life.

March 7, 2012 was one of the hardest days of your life.

We'll never forget you, Peyton.

Via dailycaller.com

You know that Pat McAfee has one of the best tackles in the league.

You know that Pat McAfee has one of the best tackles in the league.

Way more than just a punter.

NBC / Via blacktopxchange.com

You cheer for any team playing the New England Patriots.

You cheer for any team playing the New England Patriots.

Tom Brady = cry baby.

Via yardbarker.com

Speaking of which, you love Adam Vinatieri but you still feel unsure on the inside because he used to play for New England.

Speaking of which, you love Adam Vinatieri but you still feel unsure on the inside because he used to play for New England.

Everybody makes mistakes...

Andy Lyons / Via Getty Images


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15 Times The Redskins Were Offseason Champions

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With DeSean Jackson signed, it’s time to make it official: The Washington Redskins have won the offseason. Again.

So there was that time we drafted Heath Shuler...

So there was that time we drafted Heath Shuler...

Shuler was signed with the third overall draft pick in 1994 and held out for a seven-year, $19 million contract. He was benched after his second year with the Redskins and has had more Congressional victories than playoff appearances.

tradingcarddb.com / Via autographsforsale.com

...and then Michael Westbrook.

...and then Michael Westbrook.

Michael Westbrook was the fourth overall pick in the 1995 NFL draft and was a great hope for the struggling Redskins. Despite his talent, he had trouble staying on the field due to injuries. He is most remembered for punching teammate Stephen Davis.

Doug Pensinger/Allsport

And those times when we signed Bruce Smith...

And those times when we signed Bruce Smith...

He signed with the Redskins — in a five-year deal worth $25 million — coming off one of his worst seasons as a pro, having recorded only seven sacks the year prior for Buffalo. "That's not enough," he told reporters. He averaged 7.25 sacks in four years in Washington.

Al Messerschmidt / Getty Images

Deion Sanders...

Deion Sanders...

Deion signed a seven-year deal worth $56 million. He played one season, and recorded four interceptions and a forced fumble.

Jon Ferrey/Allsport


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Metta World Peace Describes America If He Were President In Bizarre, Racial-Stereotype-Filled Tweets

12 Hockey Confessions Discovered on Whisper

28 Reasons Why Buster Posey Is A Wish Come True For Giants Fans

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Buster is the ultimate dream catcher. Let’s revisit the best Buster Posey moments leading up to the 2014 season.

"With the fifth selection in the first round of the 2008 first year player draft, the San Francisco Giants select Gerald D. Posey, a catcher from Florida State University"

youtube.com

Or as we know him, Buster.

Or as we know him, Buster.

Ezra Shaw / Getty Images

We've watched him since his first home run in the majors.

View Video ›

dailymotion.com

And we're lucky enough to call him a Giant through 2022.

And we're lucky enough to call him a Giant through 2022.

AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez


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The New Florida State Logo Has Been Leaked And Fans Are Not Happy

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No, this is apparently not a belated April Fools’ joke.

Florida State released this teaser a couple weeks ago and the FSU Vice President told ESPN that there would be minor alterations to the iconic logo.

“The changes are very minor and the primary thing people will see is consistency in the garnet.”

youtube.com

But according to these new photos of prematurely released FSU merchandise, the logo has more than a few "minor changes."

But according to these new photos of prematurely released FSU merchandise, the logo has more than a few "minor changes."

imgur.com

imgur.com


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